Written by Simran Nihalani
Before I came to SFU, I thought networking was something people in the corporate world did in suits, exchanging business cards and saying random stuff like “let’s circle back.” Unfortunately, after I took BUS 203, I found out that students are also expected to network, which meant I could no longer delay the inevitable.
The first few networking events I attended felt very unnatural and super super stressful. I would walk into the room, look around at groups of people already talking, and suddenly become hyper-focused on whatever snacks were available. At one point, I think I spent five full minutes reading the label on a bottle of water just to look occupied. I used to think that networking meant walking up to someone important, introducing myself perfectly with an elevator speech I had prepared in class, and somehow convincing them that I was a very impressive person within ten seconds. That idea made every conversation feel like both a task and an interview I had not prepared for. I was constantly thinking about what to say next instead of attentively listening to the person in front of me. But over time, I realized networking is much less serious than I had made it in my head. Most people are not expecting a perfectly rehearsed introduction. They are usually just happy that someone approached them first, especially because there is a good chance they are feeling awkward too. One thing that helped me was to stop treating every conversation like it needed to lead to a job, internship, or life-changing opportunity. Sometimes, a conversation is simply a conversation. You might talk to someone about their career, their uni experience, or how both of you somehow got lost trying to find the event room. Even when nothing immediate comes from it, you still learn something and become more comfortable speaking to new people.
I have also learned that asking questions is much easier than trying to sound impressive. People generally enjoy talking about themselves and their experiences, so asking how they entered their field or what they wish they had known as a student can lead to a much more genuine conversation. It also saves me from giving a five-minute speech about myself that nobody requested. Networking still does not come naturally to me. I still occasionally forget someone’s name immediately after they introduce themselves, and I am still working on ending conversations without saying, “Well um okay, bye.” However, I no longer see networking as a performance. It is really about being curious, showing interest, and slowly building relationships. You do not need to be the loudest person in the room or speak to everyone there. Even one meaningful conversation is better than collecting ten LinkedIn connections you will never speak to again.
So, for anyone who would rather be anywhere else during a networking event, my advice is to start small. Speak to one person, ask a real question, and remember that most people are probably just as unsure as you are. And when everything else fails, the snack table is usually a reliable place to begin.